Almost 34 week doctor appointment

It's been three weeks since my last appointment with my doctor and thankfully nothing exciting has been happening so it was a semi-boring visit (I'm just fine with it staying that way). Baby boy has been performing some big movements recently which surprised me because I guess I thought he didn't have a lot of room in there. Today it looks like he is breech because a strong heartbeat could be found for the first time towards the top of my belly. Breech doesn't cause an issue with a scheduled c-section but it does mean that a pediatrician will be in the delivery room if he stays that way (hospital policy).

Otherwise, I am feeling better than I was last time at 34 weeks. Biff and Harry the hemorrhoids are still hanging around, but aren't causing any issues so that's helpful. I am sleeping better- I remember getting up to pee every hour and needing to change positions every hour last time- again, still having to pee once or twice a night, but it's not an every hour sort of thing (not yet at least). Baby boy doesn't feel like he is pushing up on my lungs and making it hard to breathe (doctor attributed that to the fact that my ligaments have already stretched so baby is sitting a little lower this time around). I'm not taking Tums three or four times a day, so I'm guessing that this baby is not coming out with a lot of hair (if the old wives tale is true)? And while I would love a nap most days, I am not struggling without one- although I am likely drinking more caffeine than I did with Izzy (I tried not to drink any with her). No caffeine this time around would NOT be possible.

That being said, I am super emotional. The last two nights I have been crying. The first night was towards the end of CP's 40th birthday and I felt bad that I didn't make it more special (it was a Tuesday night)...but I was exhausted and sometime exhaustion makes me cry. I went to bed over an hour earlier than usual which was very necessary. Yesterday I had a rough day at work where my problem employee was causing me lots of stress, then I came home to a manical Izzy who was overtired and upset about everything (example: she was mad that I wouldn't give her a popsicle before dinner). She was hitting and kicking me and generally melting down while CP was asking me to bring plates and stuff outside for dinner, then CP made a snarky comment about not helping and I just dissolved into tears because I was doing my best to handle Izzy and couldn't do two things at once. He apologized, but I just felt like I couldn't do anything right. Argh.

But back to the doctor appointment- I did talk to her about tying my tubes during my c-section. She said that recovery is a bit tougher, but that it wouldn't affect my hormones at all. I would still get the same period as usual and the procedure would lengthen the amount of time I am in surgery (of course). If I had a lot of scar tissue then they wouldn't make a huge effort to tie the tubes. I then asked whether birth control would be a the better option for me because of my previous history of endo and my ongoing issue with fibroids. She did say that birth control or the Mirena IUD could be good options because they could keep some hormones in check and could slow/stop the growth of both conditions. Many women go on birth control between ages 45-50 anyway as odd issues with periods like heavy flows, sporadic bleeding and hot flashes tend to happen. I have to talk to CP, but I really am leaning towards the birth control or possibly the IUD. I really don't want a longer recovery than need be. I'm already going through a major surgery- why complicate things even more? And while I am adamant that this is my last baby, what if something happened to my kids? Would I want to have another one? I hate to shut the door just in case.

Needless to say, Baby boy is growing well and had a strong heartbeat. My next appointment is in two weeks where I will finally get another ultrasound to see how he is doing.