Afterwards I met with the nurse and she said that most likely my doctor is going to want me to continue my meds and come back next week if things haven't happened naturally by then. I pushed back on that because I have now run out of two of my meds and if there is no hope then why waste money getting refills? Then the conversation became a little awkward because essentially, I have to schedule my miscarriage fairly soon. CP leaves on the 23rd for Mexico and will be gone all week. Neither of us have any confidence that this is a viable pregnancy and would like to try again as soon as we are able to. That means we are not wanting to wait around while my HCG levels potentially keep rising for another week. That also means that if I am going to take Misoprostol that he needs to be in town in case I have to go to the ER from too much blood loss (something that the nurse warned about- basically if you soak through more than one pad in an hour) and to take care of Izzy. Currently I am waiting for the nurse to call me back with my HCG level and next steps.
Emotionally, I think that I am doing okay. I doubt I will stay this way once I start bleeding but for now, I am in a little bubble. I currently don't feel pregnant which helps me pretend that all is well and everything is normal.
17 comments:
I am so sorry to hear this. I wish things had turned out differently. I do agree that you will want your husband home while taking that medication.
I'm so sorry that this is happening. I have been there (before I had my daughter) and it was pretty devastating to me. And the hormonal roller coaster definitely didn't help. I'm wishing you a peaceful time going through this. You will get to the other side, although for me the pain has definitely not gone away entirely. It's all part of the infertility PTSD. :-)
As a side note, I have since gone on to have a baby and I am currently 5w5d with #2 (staying hopeful) and we ended up doing CCS/PGS (chromosomal testing of the embryo). If you decide to do another cycle, I hope you'll consider this as it has brought so much peace of mind to us. The miscarriage rate at our clinic is so much lower for tested embryos, around 5%.
I'm so sorry. This sucks on so many levels.
Take good care of yourself and push for what you need. No guilt.
Blech, this is sucky, I'm sorry for the tough times still to come.
I'm so sorry my dear. This is not what anyone wants to hear or have to go through. I am glad to hear however, that you are doing okay. I agree that you should push for things to move forward. Don't put off the inevitable if they are sure this is it.
I'm sorry. I'll be thinking of you.
This must be so tough. I think you're probably doing the right thing pushing it forward...I have a close friend that finally got pregnant naturally after a long time trying, and then at her 6 week ultrasound found out it wasn't viable. But that baby held on until almost 10 weeks. You don't have that luxury with Izzy and your schedule. I'm sorry you have to go through this at all.
I'm sorry that you got this news today. It sounds like you are making the decision you are comfortable with and that's what is most important. Sometimes just moving forward is what helps make things feel better. I know it always did for me.
Oh this totally sucks! so sorry to hear that you are still in limbo. thinking of you.
Oh this totally sucks! so sorry to hear that you are still in limbo. thinking of you.
I'm so so sorry. I was hoping that everything would still be okay with this pregnancy. Sending hugs your way!
Hugs. I'm so sorry.
Oh honey I'm so sorry. Hugs!
I am so sorry to hear this! Hugs
I am so sorry to hear this. This sucks so much. Sending so many good thoughts to you and hoping this next part is over quickly. Xoxo.
Oh I'm so so sorry :( this is just so awful to be waiting in this place of limbo. I keep checking to see how you're doing...thinking of you lots.
Ugh. I'm so so sad to hear this. But why isn't the nurse or doctor doing your ultrasounds?! I am not trying to give false hope or anything, but dammit you deserve better than a tech in moments like this. I really really wanted this to work out for you. Sorry if this is not helpful lol!
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