This Saturday my next door neighbor (Neighbor #1) dropped a bomb- she is 8 weeks pregnant. She already has 3 boys, the youngest is currently 5 years old. She has been drooling over Izzy and I knew that she was thinking about it, but has mentioned numerous times how sick she gets when pregnant so she wasn't entirely looking forward to doing it again. She also mentioned at one point that she only wants a girl and would do gender selection but I have no idea if they went through with that or if they were kidding.
We happened to be with another neighbor of ours (Neighbor #2) who has two girls (the youngest only 1 month older than Izzy). Neighbor #2 knows a little bit about our infertility (no one else on the block knows)- she knows that we had to use IVF to have Izzy and that I had a miscarriage this spring. Her best friend is struggling with infertility so I try to help her with what to say/what not to say and how to help as she is pretty clueless since she had no fertility struggles.
However I had to hold back a snarky comment when Neighbor #2 said "Oh I want to be pregnant again too! I need to get pregnant soon!"
If only it were that easy....
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17 comments:
Yeah, I have a friend who once said something about planning to get pregnant one month so she'd be giving birth at a specific time that was convenient to her. As if people can actually do that. Oh wait, they can. Sigh.
Oh if only... I can't even imagine being able to think that way.
Oh if only... I can't even imagine being able to think that way.
Oh if only... I can't even imagine being able to think that way.
Ugh. I'm rolling my eyes for you on this end. Hang in there lady.
Ugh. Neighbor in-the-know disappoints me. Boo.
Can you even imagine it being that easy? ugh. Some people don't know how lucky they are!
"I need to get pregnant soon" oh dear. I think it's great that you are trying to help her learn to be a little more sensitive--very generous of you!
The neighbour thing is so hard (like work pregnancies) because you watch it progress day after day. And the conversation seems to always gravitate towards the pregnancy. Hang in there.
I understand wanting to have a girl if they already have 3 boys, but it sounds so.... demeaning to the boys that they would go through a gender selection process. Unless of course they were already doing IVF and had that option readily available to them anyway, which I don't get the impression was the case.
Amber- oh no they are quite fertile. No need for IVF.
That's what I thought! Like I said, I understand wanting a girl, but at the same time, what does it say about the boys they already have? Would they terminate the pregnancy if they find out it's another boy, just so they can try again for a girl? Maybe I'm reading too much into it!
Okay. I've spent way too much time thinking about this! Lol. I know I always wanted a girl, so I get that aspect. But how does a fertile couple go about gender selection? That's the part I don't get, I guess. Even though I'd always wanted a girl, now that I have Ayden, I know what a blessing boys are as well! I most definitely wouldn't be disappointed with another boy (even though that's not ever going to happen). Maybe it's easy for me to think this way since I was extremely blessed with one of each. Maybe I should just stop over thinking this altogether! Haha! I don't know your neighbors. Maybe they were just joking!!!
i'm with amber, how does a couple not going through IVF perform gender selection?? I hope not in the "eh, it's a boy, chuck it and try again" way?!
I can't even imagine what it would be like to just cavalierly be like, "I want to get pregnant!" and then POOF it happens. People live in this beautiful bubble that they don't even know to appreciate. And how bizarre to flippantly say that they'd do gender selection??? My best friend's new neighbors asked them "How do you make a girl?" because she has two boys and a girl and the neighbors had two boys. She was speechless. I guess they didn't figure it out because they made another boy. Such a strange way to think...
Ugh. Fertiles. My husband really wants to have another baby and all I have been thinking is how nice it would be if all it took to have another one was deciding to have another one. Nope. We have a million things to consider in order to decide if it's worth trying again.
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