Getting back in shape

It's amazing how my body went from this back in March:

Yes, those are bruises from the IVF shots.  I'm pretty sure the red one on the lower right got a little infected or something because this photo was taken a few days after giving myself that shot.

To this at the very end of November:

To this one week and two days after my C-section:

Two weeks after my C-section:

Three weeks after my C-section:

And finally, one month after my C-section where I am about 5 pounds lighter than my pre-pregnancy weight (although still softer in my stomach).

Obviously one of my New Years resolutions is going to be to continue to lose weight and to try to tone up the little pouch I now have over my incision.  I'm not looking for a six pack, but it would be nice to look a little better in shirts...

Currently I am still only walking as the only workout DVDs I own are ones like 30 Day Shred and I'm not cleared to run/lift weights yet so the only jumping around will be when watching football (yay Eagles!!!).  But I am hoping that I get cleared for all types of exercise on Jan 9th at my six week post-C-section appointment.

Any suggestions on post C-section exercises?

Other than trying to get my body back into shape, I don't have any resolutions.  I never seem to follow through with them, so I might as well only have one and hope that I can at least stick to that one!! So far I have been eating fairly healthy, but tonight won't be one of those nights. Because CP and I can't go out for NYE, CP is cooking me a fancy French dinner of braised short ribs, lentils, and an unknown vegetable. I will be making French bread and possibly dessert. Hopefully Izzy decides to sleep through dinner so that we can enjoy the meal!

What are you doing for NYE?

Breastfeeding

(I wrote this almost two weeks ago and had formatting issues that couldn't be fixed on my iPad. This is the first time I have been able to get to a computer.)

Well, it seems like every new mom not only has a birth story posted, but also a post on breastfeeding. I might as well join the club.

I went into breastfeeding fully convinced that it was going to be HARD. Reading posts from Bits and Peaces and Esperanza along with getting advice from friends like "don't quit on your worst day" and "I cried for 6 weeks straight" made me nervous. When people asked if I was going to breastfeed, I would say "I hope so!" but I knew that there was a possibility that it wouldn't work out. I also talked with CP beforehand, telling him that I would need support and for him to not let me quit. We also went to a breastfeeding class together. I'm happy to say that even though Izzy and I have had our ups and downs, three weeks into being a milk machine, it is working out.

Izzy lost 10.4% of her birth weight in the hospital. She had a good latch with a wide mouth, but fell asleep quickly after latching on. Once I got home from the hospital my milk was in but because she would fall asleep, I would have to switch boobs 4-5 times a feeding. I didn't think that was normal, but she was feeding every three hours and didn't seem to starve inbetween. Now I'm pretty sure that she wasn't getting the more caloric milk that comes after nursing for 5 minutes and thus not gaining enough weight.

One week after birth she was at 7 lbs 7 oz (birth weight was 8 lbs 3 oz). Two weeks after birth (when a baby is supposed to be up to their birth weight) she was only up to 7 lbs 13 oz. To my doctor's credit, even at two weeks he didn't talk about supplementing with formula- yet. But I did start pumping once a day after a feeding and then giving that bottle to Izzy.

Tips in the hospital that were very helpful included tickling or tapping the bottom of Izzy's feet, touching her body with a wet washcloth, stroking her chin, and taking off all of her clothes- all of these in an effort to keep her awake. We also tried lots of "aids" while in the hospital- nipple shells, the pump (including a bottle to feed her the pumped milk), a syringe to put milk on/near her lips, and the nipple shield. I was worried about the use of these aids on whether it would lead to the dreaded nipple confusion, but one of the lactation consultants told me that in all of her years, she has only seen nipple confusion happen once. I'm pretty happy with the fact that we used so many aids as I learned how to use the pump before leaving the hospital and from feeding Izzy bottles of my pumped milk, she is already used to bottle feeding and that won't be a problem when she heads to daycare. Even using the nipple shields for the past two+ weeks hasn't been the end of the world. I have offered my naked nipples a couple of times and she has been fine eating from them- the shields help her stay awake longer though by stimulating the roof of her mouth when she eats. At some point I may get rid of them, but for now they are fine.

D day was yesterday (note: the Thursday before Christmas) when Izzy had a weight check at one day shy of 3 weeks old. She had to be above her birth weight or else. I told her to hold her pees and poos until after she got on the scale, but of course she had a massive diaper when we started to take her clothes off. In the end, it didn't matter as she weighed in at 8 lbs 8 oz and I could officially breathe a sigh of relief.

So what advice can I offer? I think that going into the breastfeeding experience knowing that both you and your baby need to learn and work together is key. It's not going to be easy, so having patience and not freaking out during the first couple of days makes a world of difference when it comes to your sanity. Know that breastfeeding is not painless- so far it hasn't been too painful, but my right nipple has a tendency to crack (as it is right now), and that doesn't exactly feel great...  My last tidbit of advice is to take advantage of any tips and aids offered in the hospital. Izzy and I would not be where we are without them.

(Since I wrote this Izzy and I have done even better. No more cracked nipples, no more using lanolin, and at her 1 month checkup Izzy weighed 9 lbs 4.7 oz.)

1 month old

Izzy is one month old today. I seriously can't believe it. I feel like my pregnancy was light years ago and that we have had her in our lives for much longer than a month.

She is doing quite well. We marveled at the fact that on her first day she had great neck control and it just keeps getting better. She will tolerate tummy time for a few minutes and will turn her head from side to side to follow us/our voice, but will also burst into tears when she is done. She does enjoy playing what we call "Izzy Inchworm." She lays on her stomach and when we put our hands on the soles of her feet she uses her leg muscles to push forward on the mat. In addition, the mat has an activity bar that we have been bringing out more recently- the past few days we have noticed that if we crinkle the butterfly Izzy will intensely check it out.

Izzy loves her MamaRoo, but doesn't spend a ton of time in it. She also likes her car seat/the car so far. As long as there is someone around to hold her and we aren't eating a meal, Izzy is usually in someone's arms. Her doctor said that we can't spoil her at this age so unless we are asleep, we hold her and interact with her as much as possible. From day one we liked to test her mimic response- either sticking out our tongue or opening our mouth wide to have her copy us. It's quite cute. She holds her head up a lot while we are holding her as well. Every once in a while she will "dive bomb" when we have her at our shoulder- basically she throws herself away from the body that is holding her for an unknown reason.

Sleeping-wise she has been pretty good. From the first day home she has been just fine in the Pack n' Play bassinet in our room at night. I also put her down in it when I take my morning nap. She also sleeps on us throughout the day. We can generally get her to bed between 10 and 12 and she will usually wake up every three hours to feed. Breastfeeding is going better so most feedings are just both-boob affairs before going back to sleep (instead of switching boobs 4-5 times in a session).  I have been reading to her almost every night which she enjoys. She  also politely ignoring my bad voice and allows me to sing the ABC song and the Eagles fight songs to her. :-)

To increase my milk supply I have been trying to pump once a day. The problem is that I am not consistent and neither are my boobs. Sometimes I will pump 20 ml from both boobs which is depressing, sometimes it is 80ml. A lot of it depends on how hydrated I am.  

I haven't tried to use my nursing cover in public just yet so I do my best to pump before we go somewhere to have a bottle to feed her if she gets hungry. Izzy is a very loud and voracious eater (when she is awake) and her guzzling/heavy breathing noises would just be awkward. Are these noises normal or is it just my child who is really noisy?

What else....she still loves snuggling, completely curled up on someone's upper chest with her legs tucked in. To be honest, it is my absolute favorite position with her. Sometimes she will drape an arm around your shoulder/upper arm and hang on like a little monkey. On Christmas we had to wash the diaper change pad cover twice because when we were in the middle of changing her she peed all over herself/the cover. Whoops! She is not a fan of baths but does like it when we wash her hair. Go figure. We have taken her on a few walks around the neighborhood which she has enjoyed but it has been so freaking cold. She has also been to a few restaurants and the outdoor mall- we have been careful to not allow people to get close and/or touch her. She has had a few hours in the Bjorn, but nothing extensive. Her first Christmas was exhausting and she slept almost the entire day! Finally, sometimes when her startle reflex is triggered, she throws her hands up. We like to joke that she is throwing up her gang signs. :-)

Basically she is perfect which her doctor declared after her one month visit today. :-) She is up to 9 lbs, 4.7 oz and is 21.5 inches tall. We are head over heels in love with her!

Izzy at Christmas

She strikes again

Only three days before Christmas and my sister struck again. It wasn't enough to invite four extra people plus a baby to Thanksgiving, the day before my scheduled c-section. Now she was calling to ask another favor.

CP and I had decided, after speaking with the pediatrician, to not attend Christmas afternoon at my aunt's house. Thirty people including a bunch of kids was a recipe for Izzy getting sick and we didn't want her to possibly get a fever and have a major workup in the hospital. We had already agreed to watch my sister's dog while my sister, her boyfriend, and my parents went to my aunt's house. He is an okay dog- not really well trained, but at least he tires Buster out. 

Well now she was calling because her boyfriend agreed to watch a neighbor's dog for the week and could we also watch that dog while they are at my aunt's house? I thought about it for approximately 2.5 seconds and said no. While they are at my aunt's house I want to relax and enjoy the rest of the day with CP and Izzy- not care after some random dog. The last time she brought a neighbor's dog it barked, snapped, and growled at my dogs the entire time and it was quite a mess (famous last words from my sister- "but this dog is usually so nice!" At some point she will learn that it is generally not a good idea to bring a strange dog to another dog's house.). Not to mention, Koda is steadily declining (more in a future post), so I don't want to stress her out with another dog coming into our house.

Turns out my instinct was right. As soon as I said no my sister started whining about what she was going to do with the dog as it is a PUPPY and is in constant need for attention. Oh and it's some sort of small dog which guarantees that Buster will hate it. (Shakes my head.) My sister tried to conveniently leave out all of that pertinent information when asking us for her "favor." 

Oh well. It's Christmas, she is family, and she could be much worse I guess. I hope all of you have a drama-free day. 

Snippets since birth

A couple of you guys asked....my sister did not get engaged over thanksgiving. Our guests weren't too bad but the baby did end up using the exersaucer and the high chair. :-/ I would have looked like the biggest bitch if I had said no, so I just tried not to think about it.

You know on sitcoms when the father drives 5 miles an hour home from the hospital? That was CP as we took Izzy home. It was seriously the most adorable thing ever.

Help when coming home with a baby is awesome. I know that some people want to bond with just their husband and the baby but I was terrified of not knowing what to do and I wanted my mom. Turns out I either have a fairly easy baby or people are right, your motherly instinct just kicks right in as I haven't been at a loss of what to do with Izzy. That being said, my mom was super helpful by doing laundry, making meals, holding Izzy while I showered, etc.

Right now my MIL is staying with us for a week and I was VERY EXCITED to go to my RESOLVE dinner last night. My MIL is great and we do get along but it's the same stories over and over (and no break since Sunday because CP is at work this week). Also, she has continued to tell the "I knew CP was going to be a good father" stories that were so much fun to listen to as we were battling infertility. (Sarcasm)

A week after Izzy was born my dad set up a photo shoot at our house for their Christmas card. It's been so adorable to see my dad as a grandparent- my mom says that he seems more excited about Izzy's arrival than he was for my arrival (although I'm not sure how to feel about this- maybe because he can leave Izzy here after a visit?).

Cloth diapering so far has been great and really easy. Definitely feel good about my choice to do so.

I have been trying to eat rolled oat oatmeal and drink Mothers Milk tea every day to keep my milk supply up. Unfortunately, the tea gives me awful gas so I have had to discontinue using it. It's a good thing that I really like oatmeal!

Two days ago, Izzy and I took our first walk around the neighborhood. We finally had a nice day out and it felt great to get out and stretch my legs.





So far Koda has been fairly aloof towards Izzy, while Buster is fascinated. He follows whomever is holding her around the house and loves to lick her feet. He also loves laying down right near the mat we put down for tummy time. It's adorable.





That's all that I can think of today!

Recovery from a c-section

Day of surgery

Once the surgery was over I was wheeled up to the recovery room. The spinal started wearing off and I started to feel my incision. I had tons of shivering (even though I wasn't cold) and teeth chattering. That seems to be my m.o. when I come out of surgery. After about two hours I was moved up to my room in the maternity ward. I didn't have a ton of pain, but I also wasn't moving around. The nurses put compression boots on my legs that filled up every couple of minutes with air- that was to make sure I didn't get a blood clot. I also had different machines hooked up to me checking my blood pressure, oxygen level, etc. so there was a lot of beeping and hissing going on in our room.  I also had an IV for hydration and pain meds and a huge pad between my legs for bleeding.

CP and Izzy slept in the room with me. Izzy was up crying most of the night and needed to be held by one of us at all times so CP and I got about an hour and a half of sleep that night. I couldn't leave the bed so I wasn't a tremendous help and I was trying to breastfeed every three hours. We knew Iz was at least getting something as she had some wet diapers.

Day 2

The next day a nurse helped me stand up fairly early on which was to help with my recovery. The pain of getting from a laying down position to sitting and then to standing was nothing like the pain after my fibroid surgery. I'm guessing it has to do with where the doctors made the incision- even though it is much longer than any of my other 5 scars, it isn't used as much for that movement. I was surprised and happy that I wasn't going to feel like my insides were ripping apart again because that was not fun.

I also had both the catheter and the compression boots taken out/off this day. Nurses had to help me to the bathroom where I got the oh-so-glamorous mesh underwear and huge pad. Iz got checked by the pediatrician (she looks great!) and I got checked by a doctor (your incision is perfect!).

This day was a bit rough as I did my best to recover from major surgery and battle no sleep. My pain levels weren't too bad though. I was allowed to shower but chose to wait until the next day.  When my parents came to visit, they offered to hold Izzy while we took naps. This was super helpful and even my 30 minutes of sleep during the day felt great. 

I was still trying to breast feed every three hours and it really was hit or miss. One nurse gave me nipple shells which helped to bring out my nipples prior to feeding.  The nice thing about a different nurse every 8 hours or so is that they all have different tips and tricks, but at times consistency would have been nice. We only had two nurses that were not super helpful the entire stay which was good.

That night CP and I did a better job of sleeping while the other person held Izzy, but it was still a rough night.

Day 3

This morning we got to meet with a lactation consultant.  She warned us that starting on this day, babies tend to get very frustrated because they are hungry and your milk hasn't come in yet.  She advised me to start pumping until I saw milk, then to get Izzy to latch.  This definitely helped because Izzy was almost inconsolable when she was hungry and getting her to latch when she was that angry was difficult.

I felt better and could move around the room, but was warned not to overdo it.  I also got to take a shower which felt down right luxurious. 

Randomly, my legs filled with fluid during the day which the nurses told me was normal.  You get a lot of fluid pumped into you during surgery and when that is mixed with starting to walk around, most people blow up.  My feet were more swollen at this time than they were during pregnancy- it was really gross.

The hospital food was pretty disgusting and CP was getting bored with eating in the cafeteria, so that night we ordered sushi.  It was awesome and totally worth it.

That night Izzy's weight dropped down to 7 lb, 4 oz (down from her birth weight of 8 lb, 3oz), or about 10.4%.  While up to 10% of weight loss is normal, the extra .4% didn't make the nurses happy.  No one tried to push formula on me though and they could tell that my milk was about to come in and her weight would start to increase.

Day 4

We were doing well as a group and had the option of going home this day, but we chose to stay another day and I'm glad we did.  Although the constant (every 2-3 hour) check-ins by nurses and aides were annoying, the extra breastfeeding tips were really helpful.  That day my milk came in and I was very excited about my ridiculous fun bags.

The best news of the day was that Harry and Biff have deflated and will hopefully be retreating in the coming days or weeks.

Day 5

We were warned that discharge would take a while and that we would be waiting and the nurse was right.  We had our pediatrician visit and an OB visit to check up on me and Izzy and got some more helpful tips from a different lactation consultant.  She advised me to start wearing a nipple shield while breastfeeding to keep Izzy awake.  The shield would hit the roof of Izzy's mouth, thus keeping her awake for longer periods of time while feeding.

After getting home, I weighed myself.  I weighed 10 lbs less than my last weigh in at OB's office at 38 weeks 1 day (not sure how close OB's office and home scale are though). The fluid build up in my legs is not helping, I have to admit that i was hoping for a bigger drop off.

Today I also had my first little poop which wasn't too bad.

I do have some pain in my uterus when peeing, which my doctor attributed to them moving around my organs during surgery.  This is normal and should go away in a few days.

Day 7 

Down another 6 lbs!  I had a slightly more satisfying poop, but I am still constipated.

Day 8 

Amazingly enough, I seem to have stopped bleeding!  I'm only taking Motrin at this point as the Norco results in constipation.  My only pain is when I pee which is odd because the pain is mainly close to my butt.

Day 9

Another day of no bleeding and I'm down another 6 pounds!  At this point I'm only 3 pounds away from my first OB appointment weight/pre-BFP weight.  Not sure what my weight was before I started on the fertility meds and I really need to lose a lot more. Let's hope healthy eating and breastfeeding can keep the scale dropping even though I can't exercise just yet.  I'm still having pain when I pee which can't be normal.  I'm looking forward to my OB appointment.  The fluid in my feet and ankles is finally much better. Shoes that were tight on discharge day are now okay to wear.  I still have nice sock lines though.

Day 13

Today I'm back to my pre-BFP weight but boy is my stomach still soft. Stomach skin seems to be pulling back up so that I have less of a pouch, but stretch marks are still angry and red (albeit less red). Gas is not as much of a problem today.  Bleeding has started back up again.

Today I met with my OB and asked her about the peeing pain.  She seems to think that I might have an internal hemorrhoid so she gave me a steroid that I get to stick where the sun don't shine.  (My OB called on Monday and let me know that I actually have a UTI, so I am now working on getting rid of that with antibiotics while not getting thrush at the same time).

Day 14
It has now been two weeks so I am officially cleared to drive, walk up and down the stairs as much as I want, and to start walking for exercise (too bad it's FREEZING out!).  I am still not allowed to carry anything heavy (basically just Izzy), but it will be nice to start to do more around the house again.

Birth story

If there is one thing that I would have changed I would have gone to bed earlier than I did Thanksgiving night. Our guests had left after dessert so the rest of us just hung out watching Modern Family reruns. At one point I went to the bathroom and thought that I was maybe leaking amniotic fluid because my underwear was wet (it didn't seem to be the normal discharge)...but decided that I would wait a little bit see if it continued or not (spoiler alert- it did not). Finally around 11:30 I decided to head to bed after having some Turkey Day leftovers. It still wasn't hitting me that I would meet my son or daughter the next day. Right before I got into bed I'm fairly certain that I had a REAL contraction as it lasted about five minutes and was painful.  

It took a while for me to fall asleep and when I finally did, I had the weirdest dream that I gave birth vaginally to a Butterball turkey.  The hospital was like a library with other people trying to check out books while I walked around with the turkey, trying to figure out how to get it into my uterus to turn it into a child.  I was very aware that I only had so much time to attach blood vessels.  After a while of trying to get someone behind the circulation desk and not getting anyone's attention, I started to realize that this is not how it works and WTF why did I not have a child at the end of these past 9 months??  What can I say- it was quite an odd dream!

After waking up, CP and I took showers, said goodbye to the humans and dogs in our house and headed off for the hospital to be there by 9am. We were a little annoyed after checking Facebook and seeing that CP's sister posted something that tagged the two of us and proclaimed that she was very excited we were having the baby today.  We weren't putting anything on Facebook until the baby had been delivered....it's just like both of our sisters to steal the thunder from us!

On the drive over, the mood was still very relaxed. After parking the car and heading to Labor & Delivery, I was led into a room where I changed into the L&D tube top and gown. The baby's heart rate looked great on the monitor and it went up whenever she squirmed.  I think getting into the room, having the anesthesiologist come to talk to me about what would happen/the potential risks of a spinal tap, and then having my doctor and her resident come into the room to talk about what would happen/potential complications, etc completely got to me. My legs started shaking uncontrollably and my blood pressure was all over the place. CP even seemed to be a little anxious, especially once they told him to suit up in the OR scrubs.  

I was wheeled into the OR and immediately scared everyone in the room by stepping over my IV line while on the stairs leading up to the bed instead of waiting for them to fix it for me. The anesthesiologist resident gave me the spinal tap which consisted of a smaller needle to dull the pain, then the bigger needle full of the serious medication. Neither one was that painful, although I was worried that my legs shaking uncontrollably would cause him to miss and puncture something else!  Part of the way through the procedure he was called and told about lunch that day- I was thinking to myself...ummm he's a little busy not paralyzing me!!!

The medicine started working pretty quickly as I lay down on the narrow bed as doctors prepared around me. Not being able to feel from my chest down was odd. I could feel the doctor's touch as he checked my legs, thighs, and stomach but had no pain from the pinching.  As soon as everyone was ready, I started to feel a little odd from the medicine so they quickly gave me anti- nausea medicine which made me feel better. CP was brought into the room and the doctors got started.  I had no idea what was going on behind the curtain, but the nice anesthesiologist kept a conversation going which was a nice distraction. Every once in a while he would lean over the curtain and tell me where they were in the procedure. 

Pretty soon I heard " okay you are going to feel pressure" and really that was the worst part of the surgery (but still not that bad). Basically they had to press down right below my breasts which made it hard to breathe when they were trying to pull Izzy out.

Izzy immediately started with a gargled scream as soon as she hit the cold air and my doctor said "it's a girl!" I immediately started to cry in relief and happiness. CP said he got a little misty eyed as well. They brought her over to the table to clean her up a bit, weigh her, get the gunk out of her throat, etc all while we watched. Her apagar scores were 8 then 9. She was a perfect shade of pink with a ridinkulous head of dark brown, almost black hair.

After only a few minutes Izzy was in CP's arms and right next to me. The rest of the procedure is a bit of a blur as I was watching my new daughter, first off amazed that she was a girl (75% of people guessed boy because I was all belly) and secondly, shaking like a leaf. Anesthesia tends to do it to me but my arms couldn't stop shaking and my teeth couldn't stop chattering. CP held onto Izzy with one arm, taking pictures while also holding onto my arm. The nice anesthesiologist also took a few family pictures as well.

My OB found one of the fibroids- it is located behind the uterus and isn't too big right now.  We will have to keep an eye on it as it is located in a crappy area to remove it and just hope that it doesn't get too big.  The rest of the procedure seemed to take forever compared to how quickly Izzy came out, but finally I was stitched up and ready to head to the recovery area.  

Annual Pretty Princess Day

Today is my 35th birthday. I am now considered of advanced maternal age.  Despite my 2:30 and 6:40am wakeups to feed Iz, I am also pretty damn happy.

I knew my annual pretty princess day would get overshadowed by Iz's arrival so it's really fine that we aren't doing much of anything. It's tremendously cold right now in Chicago and other than a quick trip to the pediatrician for her first visit and a trip to the grocery store after buying a Christmas tree off a lot, we have stayed in the safety and warmth of the house. I also can't drive for another few days....

So yeah, I have an exciting day ahead of feeding and diapering Iz, with lots of snuggling inbetween (the snuggling is the best).  CP brought me a Dunkin Donuts hot chocolate this morning, made me breakfast which included Black Forest bacon from Whole Foods (THE best bacon on the planet), and got me a small Black Forest cake for my birthday.  We aren't going out for a fancy dinner, but between my awesome husband who is so far the cutest dad on the planet and my amazing daughter, my 35th year should be a great year!!

I hope to have a few posts up soon!

Say hello to Izzy!

Remember my post from just a few weeks ago about how I would react to being a mother? And that I was worried about the fact that I hadn't bonded with my unborn baby yet? Well, I have to say that I am fully, 100% gushingly in love with Izzy. I don't resent having to set my iPhone alarm for every three hours to feed her.  I can just sit and stare at her for long periods of time.  She is awesome.  So far no baby blues over here- and hopefully I won't get them.

I mean, how could you get sad when you get to look at this face??

Sleepy baby

More sleeping....and looking a bit Asian?

CP's arm after the hospital inks Izzy's feet....just the start of her walking all over him!  

Extreme close up

Meeting Buster for the first time.  He is SO FASCINATED by her!

Call me!

Third trimester bump pictures

The final bump pictures of my pregnancy!!  It's crazy how big my bump ended up getting!

28 weeks

29 weeks

30 weeks

31 weeks
What an awful maternity shirt!  It looks like a tent.

32 weeks

33 weeks

35 weeks
(Sadly I missed taking a picture for 34 weeks)

36 weeks

37 weeks

38 weeks

39 weeks

Introducing.....

34 months of trying to get pregnant

1 negative Hysterosalpingogram (HSG) test (missing the large fibroid)

2 sperm analyses which indicate male factor infertility

1 sh*tty GYN who tells us that our only option is donor sperm

1 trip to the urologist who told us everything was fine

3 months of Lupron hot flashes, weight gain, aching body, and headaches

1 surgery to remove a large fibroid and Stage II endometriosis

3 unsuccessful IUIs

2 different REs in two different states

2 new fibroids found prior to IVF cycle

1 devastating appointment to find out that I have possible poor egg quality due to my FSH and AMH numbers

1 saline sonogram

2 months of ingesting dr recommended supplements to help with egg quality

1 extra month of Lupron side effects

1 IVF cycle using Menopur, Gonal f, Crinone, Lupron, and an HCG trigger

Well over $3000 spent on meds, surgery, and co-pays (which is a drop in the bucket compared to a lot of people)

1 Circle & Bloom Mind-Body IVF program

11 eggs retrieved, only 6 mature enough for ICSI.  3 fertilize.  

1 blastocyst transferred, 1 slower-growing blastocyst frozen

1 successful implantation and a relatively easy pregnancy

21 pounds of weight gain during the pregnancy

We would do it all again in a heartbeat for our new DAUGHTER (!) Isabel, otherwise known as Izzy!

She came out screaming with a full head of hair, weighing 8 lbs, 3 oz with a length of 20.75 inches. She is amazing. We are still in the hospital, but I will write more (and share pictures!) when we get home.

Thanksgiving menu

I didn't want to  break my streak of posting our Thanksgiving menu, despite the fact that it is going to be a crazy day tomorrow.  I will start cleaning tonight with hopes that the dogs don't leave too much fur around the house before the guests arrive tomorrow.  This year I get out of doing any cooking, although I helped CP last night with one his dishes (and will probably help him again tonight).

My sister's boyfriend's family is still coming tomorrow, even though I am regretting telling my sister that it was okay.  Oh well- too late now!!  So we will have 10 people plus an infant tomorrow.  Should be interesting!

Turkey*- CP will be smoking the turkey this year.  We will see how it turns out!
Mashed potatoes
Stuffing
Butternut squash soup*
Wild rice salad*
Gravy*
Brussels sprouts
Vegetable tian- not sure what this is but I'm sure it's something my sister found on Pinterest and wanted to make
Salad
Bread
Pumpkin pie- you know, for the guest coming to our house that was too lazy to make it themselves or buy it on the way!!!  ARGGGHHH!
Pear tart

*CP is making all of the starred items.  The rest will be prepared by my mom and sister.

It's crazy.  Last year we were in the middle of our dining room renovation and we spent Thanksgiving weekend at my parents house in MI.  This year?  Our house is fairly done in terms of renovation and I will be a mother in two short days.  What a difference a year makes.

Interested in our menu for 2012, 2011, 2010, and 2009?  Click on the links!

How will your turkey be prepared this year?  I hope everyone has a great Thanksgiving!

Third trimester recap

With just two days left until my C-section, I am going to assume that I can talk about the third trimester without missing out on anything exciting.  Of course I say that and I am totally going to jinx myself!!

First off, this trimester went by SO QUICKLY.  

Various pregnancy symptoms that occurred throughout the trimester included needing Tums after almost every single meal- often more than just two Tums to fully calm my stomach down.  Stairs often leave me out of breath, so I have just tried to walk up them a bit slower than usual.  I have been able to keep taking long walks with Buster, but about halfway through the trimester I started having to walk slower and would get Braxton Hicks contractions throughout the walk.  Constantly feeling hot this trimester, even if it was only 60 degrees in the house, was insane.  

During my first trimester I had a few black hairs on my chin that seemed to grow back just days after plucking them.  Thanks long-term Lupron shots!  The hair on my head grew really quickly as well.  During the second trimester the rest of my hair on my body and head grew quickly, but not the unwanted hairs on my face.  For the third trimester it was like I was back in the first trimester- legs, bikini area and underarms grew slowly, but the chin hairs were back in business.  :-/

As you guys know, I have been rather busty for a while now.  This is something that only got worse with pregnancy.  When we were little, my mom used tell me and my sister to "Check the deck" when we dropped food on our chest.  I swear I am not a gross eater but I often had to check the deck during this pregnancy (a couple of times I had to check the belly!) as soup or whatever I was eating had dropped onto my body.  Can't take me anywhere!!

At the beginning of the third trimester I had an awful six-day bout with a migraine.  Thank goodness there were baby-friendly drugs that I could take to finally relieve the pain.  I only had to take them twice again the rest of the trimester.

Starting at 30 weeks I spotted my first stretch marks on the bottom of my belly.  As of today there are more of them and they are reaching higher up my stomach, but they are still only on my belly.

At 33 weeks I found two black dots on my right nipple.  A quick check by my OB and it was determined they were normal.

At 34 weeks my engagement ring had to come off.  I'm looking forward to putting BOTH of my rings back on.

Biff decided to join Harry's party at 35 weeks. He still sucks on occasion, but didn't end up inviting any more friends.  I look forward to his and Harry's demise soon.   

At 35 1/2 weeks CP finally got to see the squirming belly.  He was transfixed as my belly moved up, around, and all over the place.  (He had felt the baby move before but hadn't paid too much attention to actually seeing it.)

That same weekend CP and I decided to tackle our last home improvement project before the baby arrived. 

Every single OB visit I have had to give a urine sample.  Every single visit I have somehow managed to get some on my clothes or hands.  Until 36 weeks.  I think that I finally have it down!  Maybe I should have taken more OPK and pregnancy tests- I would have been better at this!

Around 37 weeks- HOLY SORENESS.  Sore in thighs, hips, and lady bits area.  Waddling some days, not waddling other days.  I am the most sore when I first get out of bed in the morning or when I have been sitting for a while and first get up.  This has continued for the past two weeks and isn't super comfortable.  But to be honest, I just try to roll with it as much as possible.  It is what it is.  I shouldn't be sailing through the last few weeks of a pregnancy because that wouldn't be normal.

I'm pretty excited to be having this baby soon because I was too cheap to buy a winter jacket.  I didn't really think that Chicago would not only have snow twice already this fall, but also to have highs in only the 20s!  I have been walking around with my dad's fleece that completely zips up with the outer layer of my ski jacket that only buttons halfway down.  Yep, this is how I have been rolling this month.  It's okay, you can laugh- my sister certainly did!!

Finally, don't tell my doctor but I have been trying not to drink too much water towards the end of the night so that I don't have to get up every hour to pee.  I still get up every 2-3 hours so I am not completely dehydrated, but it is still ridiculous.  I'm looking forward to not having a little person pressing on my bladder 24/7.

All of this being said, pregnancy has been an amazing and wonderful experience.  To see my body go through a huge transformation has been crazy and I feel SO, SO lucky that it has gone so well.  To this day, I am still amazed that our first IVF worked.  As I now transfer into becoming a mother in two short days, I will continue to cheer those of you still in the trenches. Thanks for sticking with me!!

I'm READY

After we finished up a lot of our last minute preparations this past weekend, I got a weird feeling that I was actually READY to have this baby.  I was actually getting EXCITED to finally meet our child.  I mean, I have been excited about being pregnant, but throughout this pregnancy I have also been terrified of what actually comes after the baby is born.  That terror has now changed over to excitement and I have to say it comes just in time!

We have taken the necessary classes- Infant Care, Infant CPR and Choking, and the Hospital Tour.  Our Breastfeeding course is this coming weekend.  The house is in order and clean.  The nursery is put together, despite the fact that the baby won't sleep in there for a few months.  All of the baby clothes, blankets, sheets, etc. have been washed and put away.  The cloth diapers are here and ready to use.  The car seats are in and have been inspected.

I wonder if this is just a natural thing that happens as you get close to the end of a pregnancy?  Is it because I am feeling rather uncomfortable these days and not sleeping very well?  As of recently, I have been thinking how nice it will be to have my body back.  To not have swollen everything.  To be able to put on my socks without taking a breath in and holding it.  To not have crazy heartburn after simply eating a bagel.  To have a glass of wine.  To go for a run (even though that is going to be so, so, painful trying to get back into running).  To eat blue cheese and sushi again.  To maybe get rid of Harry and Biff.  To not feel as if my lady parts are bruised and beaten.  To wear something other than maternity pants (although they are so, so comfortable).

That's not to say that I am complaining at all about this pregnancy.  This has been what I would consider an easy pregnancy.  I don't have an outie, I can still shave my legs, and I have been able to exercise (lots and lots of walking) almost the whole time.  Every time the baby moves in my belly I cherish that feeling.

Maybe part of my feeling of being ready is that with a week and two days left, I worry when the baby has a slower-movement day.  I am SO CLOSE to the finish line and I can't even imagine how devastating it would be to lose my baby at this point.  I do sort of want to hurry up time and make sure that the baby is out of me and safe.

I am looking forward to finally being able to say if I have a son or daughter. I am looking forward to finally telling people the baby's name.  I am looking forward to seeing the baby's face and trying to figure out what parts of the baby are me and what parts are CP.  I am looking forward to learning about the baby's personality, likes and dislikes, and how I function as a mother.  I know that it is going to be a ROUGH and TOUGH road ahead, but I think that I am ready for it.  I am definitely more ready than I have ever been in my life.

Thanksgiving issues

This Thanksgiving was supposed to be a more relaxing day with just CP, my parents, my sister, her boyfriend, their dog and of course, our dogs.  It's the day before CP and I go through a life changing event (including major surgery for me with the C-section), so we scaled back our usual efforts.

Of course, there is a snag to our plans.  My sister called me up earlier this week and asked if her boyfriend's mother, uncle, sister, sister's husband and sister's new baby could join us for Thanksgiving.*  SIGH.  My sister doesn't exactly think these things through ummm EVER and it's extremely frustrating.

CP talked it over and although we think that it could be an absolute disaster, we decided that we would say okay to it.  My parents have never met my sister's boyfriend's mom (mom and dad are divorced and supposedly dad is a little crazy).  A holiday would be a good time for this to happen as it will be a few short hours when everyone is in a good mood.

Well, almost everyone.  CP and I might be tearing our hair out a little more than usual with strangers in our house.  I was already going to have to clean for everyone anyway.  But I could certainly take shortcuts if it was just family.  CP and my mom were already splitting up the cooking duties; it was agreed that I should just try to relax most of the day.  However, how Buster will react to the new people in our house is always a question mark.  He will be nicely distracted by my sister's dog and hopefully we can get them to play in the backyard a bunch before the new people arrive, but Buster is always iffy around strangers.  He is definitely going to bark at them....hopefully it won't last long, they will listen to us when we tell them to just ignore him, and hopefully his bark doesn't scare the baby too much.  

But there is also something about feeling comfortable around your family.  Yes, I am supposed to be resting and relaxing that day, but even when I was basically on bed rest for the SCH during my first trimester and my FIL, his wife, and CP's aunt and uncle were in town, it was hard to do.  I know that it is going to be the same thing come next week.  You want to be a good host in your house no matter the circumstances.  Having four strangers roll into your house on a holiday makes the relaxing atmosphere disappear.

So yes, we agreed to have the extra people in our house.  We made sure to tell my sister numerous times that she MUST help clean up.  You see, we have my parents and my sister/her boyfriend over about once a month for Sunday dinner.  CP makes a fabulous meal and my mom usually brings dessert.  Who cleans up at the end of the night?  CP, myself, and my mom.  That is not going to fly on Thanksgiving.

Two other things have occurred to CP and me.  First, we now have a bunch of baby stuff set up and ready for OUR baby.  Now we will have an eight month old (I think) coming into our house and it would make perfect sense for the kid to use the baby stuff that we have in our house.  But selfishly, I want to keep these things pristine and new for OUR baby. 

The other thing is that my sister and her boyfriend have poo-poo'ed marriage for a while.  They have been together for about four years now and have also said that kids are not in their future, thus why get married?  They own a condo together and have a dog together, but again, no interest in marriage.  But lately, I think the tide may be turning.  CP and I think it is very possible that my sister and her boyfriend will steal our baby thunder and get engaged over Thanksgiving.  I mean, it would be a good time with his family and my family together, but then again, you have any other day to do it.  Not right before I am about to have a baby that CP and I worked so hard for.  Then again, maybe it won't happen and our worry of being upstaged will be for naught.  But, we could just see my sister and her boyfriend not thinking about anyone else but themselves (which is typical).

So we'll see how Thanksgiving goes.  Maybe I'll just try to focus on getting excited for the day afterwards as opposed to the holiday.....


*I almost forgot the best part.  Once we agreed to host these people, my sister sent an email to my mom and CP that said, "Oh, and we need to make sure that we make pumpkin pie because X (not sure who) has requested that we have pumpkin pie because it is his/her favorite."  Seriously??  Why don't you bring it yourself then!!  So now my mom is making two desserts because one of the randoms at our house absolutely needs to have pumpkin pie on Thanksgiving.  SIGH.

Last minute preparations

Whoops!  I didn't mean to disappear like that, but we have been quite busy with last minute preparations before the baby arrives!

*I found our pediatrician!  I was getting nervous because it's really getting down to the wire, but every other ped that came recommended didn't take my insurance.  This dr seems like he is going to be great.  He seems like he will be easy to work with, his office is close to our house, and he has night and weekend hours.

*I took our SUV in to get the base and the car seat inspected at our local police department.  Thank goodness I did because we had it in the middle of the back seat and it shouldn't have been there!  Tomorrow I will be taking the Prius in to do the same check.

*Work held a cute baby shower for me last week.  It is going to be so weird to be out for three months.  Especially now that my boss and one of my coworkers have announced that they are retiring in January.  Our department is only 10 people so if the two of them are gone and another person is 99% getting a transfer, it's going to be a whole different office upon my return.

*This past weekend CP and I cleaned out the second bedroom.  It had been basically a junk room with a queen bed for guests, but now that we have my mom and my MIL staying with us after the baby arrives (at separate times), we needed to clean it up for their stays.  Now that it is basically clean, our house is as ready is as it going to be for the baby!!  

*This week is pretty hectic trying to fit in various social obligations before the baby arrives and makes it more difficult.  Our friends braved the awful weather on Sunday and came over to our place to hang out and watch football.  Well, they have two year old twins so not a ton of football was watched as we ran around keeping them out of various things in our house, but it was nice to see them!  Last night was my RESOLVE dinner with the currently-pregnant and currently parenting fellow infertiles.  They were all so excited that I came to the dinner at almost 38 weeks pregnant.  Tonight we are going out to dinner in the city to celebrate my dad's birthday.  Then tomorrow night I am meeting a former college track teammate for dinner in the suburbs whom I haven't seen in years (she just moved to Chicago).  After all of this I hope to sleep for an entire day.  HA!

*My hospital-grade breast pump arrived yesterday in the mail (three cheers for Obamacare!).  I opened the box and checked everything out, but will wait to fully inspect it until after the breastfeeding class this Sunday.

*I took a few minutes out of my work day yesterday to check out where I am supposed to pump after coming back to work.  They actually have a Medalla pump here and if I want to, I can bring my own tubing and supplies.  Not sure what I am going to do at this point, but doing that would save me a bunch of hassle having to drag the pump and supplies back and forth three times a week.  Then I could just keep my regular pump at home.

*The underwire on my current bras has been killing me so I thought buying a nursing bra without underwire would help these last few weeks.  I went to Nordstroms where I was told they have a large selection for women with huge melons.  They only had one style that was underwire-free (I read on one of your blogs that underwire can sometimes cause mastitis) which I ended up buying, but I think that once my milk comes in, it's not going to fit anymore.  The saleswoman said that "it will stretch", but it is currently fitting NOW.  So, uh...we'll see.

*I also bought a few nursing shirts for easy access while I am on maternity leave.  I'm not going to look sexy, but at least I will be comfortable and provide easy access.

*Koda hasn't been doing well.  The bone near her eye is jutting out more and more and now the extra eye flap (not sure what it is called) is usually covering most of her eye.  We took her into the vet this past weekend and got some ointment that is helping with the irritation, but I get more worried every day.  It doesn't seem to bother her, but I can't imagine she can see through the flap.  Twice this week she hasn't been that interested in eating or only finishes half her bowl of food which is completely unlike her.  We are not sure if it is because it hurts her to eat or if it is something else.

Poor Koda.  Check out her left eye.

*I had a dream last night that I fell off a cliff.  I woke up startled at 4am and was so freaked out, I had to putz around on my phone for a few minutes before trying to go back to sleep.  I quickly googled what that meant and it basically means that I am feeling out of control about something in my life.  Hmmm....could it be that I am having a baby in less than two weeks???

Partial renovations

This last week we have been busy finishing up home improvement projects around the house before the baby arrives.  As I mentioned last Friday, we planned on just doing a partial renovation of the upstairs bathroom. Thank goodness we were able to finish it within the weekend because it created quite the mess and we didn't shower the entire weekend!!

Get ready for pictures!!

BEFORE: Here is the UGLY black bathtub that we couldn't do anything about.  However, we could get rid of the sliding glass doors.

AFTER: Success!  There are a few holes in the tile where we took out screws, but we filled them with caulk.  This is not a permanent solution, but we don't have the money to pay for someone to re-tile the floor and the walls right now.

BEFORE: Here is the wallpapered ceiling....

BEFORE: And the wallpapered door....

AFTER: After steaming the wallpaper off the ceiling, doors, and walls Friday night, CP fixed the plaster on Saturday.  Once everything was dry we primed and painted!  We still need to get the glue off the door and paint, but this beige looks 10 million times better than the wallpaper!

AFTER: Here is another view.  The paint looks oddly yellow (which it is not), but check out the ceiling- NO WALLPAPER!!!

As I said, this is only a temporary situation.

The other project was our awful, awful staircase.  Again, only a partial project, but the money for the project came from my parents as an early Christmas gift.

BEFORE:  Hey why don't we install a 1960s iron staircase that looks like it belongs outside?  What a great idea! 

AFTER: It only took one day for the guys to remove the awful iron crap and install a new wood staircase.

AFTER: Another shot of the staircase.  

The staircase is another partial renovation because while we now love the new staircase and the stair runner (installed back in January), the wallpaper is FUGLY.  Unfortunately, it extends two floors and I already have enough problems with ladders.  Soooooo at some point when we get the money, we will hire someone to take the wallpaper down and paint.  We'll get there....eventually.