Running alone

On Wednesday a woman running in my town was sexually assaulted by a man who jumped out of the bushes. It happened at 7am, so just as it was getting light out. That same night I went to a dinner with a bunch of ladies in the new-to-town club that I joined two months ago. It came up in conversation as we were talking about running.

Most of the women involved in the conversation agreed that they wouldn’t run anywhere by themselves. I was surprised to hear that. Now that I have started running again I have been running by myself or sometimes with Fuzzy Britches. I have never felt nervous or wary. At least while it has been warm there have been plenty of other people around and I haven’t been worried about someone jumping out of the woods and raping me. My general thought is that you can't worry about every.single.thing. that could happen to you- you simply have to go out and live your life.

Perhaps when the weather starts to cool down and there aren’t very many people around I would feel differently. Perhaps I should not wear headphones to listen to my crappy music and instead have the ability to hear everything around me (I generally keep the music low, but still).

Is their fear a CT thing?

Is their fear a suburban thing?

Is their fear a mother thing (a lot of the women have recently become mothers)?

Should I also be worried? I used to run by myself all the time in Chicago, Denver and Philadelphia. I was never worried for my safety. I never ran with Mace or anything else that could be used on a potential attacker. Frankly these days I am so slow that I probably wouldn’t be able to outrun anyone either.

The police do not think that it was a serial rapist. Why he chose that poor woman to pull aside is unknown. I hope they catch him.

What do you think? Do you make it a habit to never run alone?

Extra expenses

Owning a house is expensive. CP and I knew that the first few months would be expensive and, as is normal in our household, we made a list of things that we needed to do/buy and the timeframe. Things like:

*Buying firewood

*Buying yard tools (rake, shovel, lawn mower, etc). Yard tools were something that our landlord left for us at our place in MA so that we could take care of his house.

*Buying chairs for our dining room table. Instead of buying expensive chairs, CP and I ended up going to IKEA and getting chairs there. Our rationalization is that they are MUCH cheaper than what we wanted to get, but we needed them before Thanksgiving and Christmas…or else we would be renting chairs for the holidays! Plus if we have kids we won’t care as much if crayons/markers/whatever else are used on them. We can always get something nicer down the road. For now, they look fine and are good enough.

*Getting the chimney swept

Despite our planning, extra expenses have cropped up:

*New fireplace glass doors because both the house inspector and the chimney sweeper said that the old one was unusable. Did you know how expensive these things are? Thank goodness for a good looking one at Home Depot! Otherwise we were looking at spending $750!! YIKES.

*A leaking dishwasher.

*Then yesterday I headed downstairs to take Fuzzy Britches out and see a small pool of water in our sunroom. Annnnnnd now we have a leak in the roof above the sunroom. Fanf*cking tastic.

We knew that we would need a new roof in 2-3 years and had already started to plan ahead for it (by putting it on our radar screen). But if the leak continues every time it rains or snows, we may need to think about a new roof next spring, which is a HUGE expense.

What does this mean? Well, the extra expenses have convinced CP and I that it is not quite time for a puppy. It pains me to say that, but if additional expenses continue to crop up, we will not be able to put aside the money that we need to in order to not only buy the puppy, but also continue to take care of it.

Stupid homeownership.

Natural

As my monthly “day of reckoning” approaches later this week, the more months that go by without me getting pregnant, the more I worry that it will never happen for us.

Before CP and I started trying, we made the decision that we were not going to use any artificial means to try to get pregnant. While we do not judge other couples and are extremely happy for people if they get pregnant using drugs or in vitro fertilization, we made the decision that it was not for us. We didn’t want to inject anything into my body and decided to take a “whatever happens, happens” approach to getting pregnant. Adoption? We both believe that while there are thousands (millions?) of kids out there that need stable and loving homes, we are not interested in going that route either.

This approach was a lot easier to swallow when I had high hopes that we would get pregnant the first month of trying. In the spectrum of people trying to conceive and having difficulty, five months is nothing. I realize that. But for someone without any known fertility problems, it is frustrating. My body has always performed well the rest of my life- why is it failing me now? Am I one of those people that needs artificial help in order to get pregnant? If so, then we will need a miracle.

We still are planning on a future with kids. We are staying on a strict budget to try to pay down as much debt as possible before a possible pregnancy. We are not planning any expensive or long trips in the near future. I am saving up vacation and sick time so that if I do get pregnant, I can take as much maternity leave as possible. I have started charting in case January rolls around and I have my annual lady exam with no bun in the oven.

We have the house. It has enough room for kids. We have a fenced in yard that is great for Fuzzy Britches, but will also be helpful for kids. We live across the street from an elementary school and one block away from a middle school. It is a perfect location for good number of years. I have a job that allows me to stick to a pretty stable schedule and CP has not been traveling that much. In essence, we are in a good place right now.

All we need is the pregnancy.


(I hope that no one is offended by this post. Everyone’s journey to getting pregnant is different.)

10 years of changes

It’s amazing how something can change so much in 10 years. This past weekend CP and I went down to our alma mater for my 10 year reunion (we didn’t go to his 10 year last year). As we were driving down, we told each other stories about our time at school. We both had very different experiences- which is probably why we never met each other back then!

After we arrived Friday night we met up with J and another friend who drove up from DC. They allowed me to drag them to a track and field party held at a new local bar. I was the oldest alum to show up but got to say hi to my head coach and my former throws coach. It was great seeing former teammates, although there were A LOT of people there that were too young for me to know. CP and my friends were nice enough to allow me to run around the room saying hi and talking to people before we left and went to our favorite bar from college.

When we arrived we were shocked. The bar was half-full with heavy metal playing. They had karaoke going in the other room- something that NEVER would have occurred in our day. It would be too packed with people dancing. The smoking killed all of our throats- at least the alcohol was still cheap! I guess our bar of choice was no longer the “cool” bar for the school. We headed over to one of the hot spots in our day to get late night drunk food- and were shocked to find out that it had been replaced! So sad.

The next morning we got up to tailgate. A large number of girls from my sorority showed up- three of them were pregnant! I think that this event was my favorite part of the weekend because a large number of people attended and the music wasn’t too loud to talk to people and catch up. The actual football game was fun (we won!), but it was definitely more interesting back in college when I knew all of the guys on the team.

First up on Saturday night was a cocktail party for people that graduated in 2000. I was disappointed that more people didn’t show up, but then again we are in our early 30s so everyone might have been resting up for actual party. Once the younger alumni showed up, the dance party music came on and it was hard to talk to people over the loud music. A few girls and I went down to the dance floor for a while, but then it started to get too hot. Around 1am we decided it was time to leave.

Overall, I’m glad that we headed down for the reunion. It was nice to see people that I hadn’t seen in many years and that I only saw on Facebook. CP and J agreed that I was more excited about this weekend than I needed to be. If I had wanted to stay better friends with the people that I saw this weekend I could have. But there is a reason that when I head down to DC or NYC or wherever I don’t contact them to hang out. I have kept in touch with the people that I wanted to stay close with; Facebook is just a nice way to see what others are up to. In the end, I agreed with them. But it was still nice to see the changes in the campus, even if I wasn’t always sure they were good ones. The current students sure have a different experience than we did!

Do you go back for your reunions?

Reunion

Off to my 10 year college reunion this weekend.

I can’t believe that it has already been 10 YEARS since I graduated.

First time CP and I will be going back to the college we both attended….despite having mutual friends, we never met in the three years we overlapped.

Can’t wait to see some people that I haven’t seen since graduation. Even though I see them on Facebook and know what is going on with their lives, it will be fun to see them in person.

Hoping I don’t see my ex boyfriend because CP likes to pretend that I am the first person that he dated ever (silly boy) and even though it has been 10+ years since we broke up, it would still be awkward.

I hope my liver survives.

Current loves

Things that I am currently loving:

The friction block stick from Band-Aid. (Note: I have NOT been asked to review this product, nor was I sent a free sample.) Because it is no longer flip-flop season in the Northeast, I have had to start wearing shoes with backs once again. Booooo. Usually this time of the year is very painful and I do whatever I can do to either wear sneakers or backless shoes. However, after finding this product, I no longer have blisters on the backs of my feet. WIN!



Speaking of shoes, I am currently loving these babies that I picked up from an L.L.Bean Outlet store. I don’t usually go for pink, but they are SO COMFORTABLE. And now I want to add more brown to my wardrobe just to wear them all the time!

Pay no attention to the boats that I call feet....

Chai tea. CP and I are both sick and we have so far resisted turning the heat on (despite the fact that we are starting to dip into the 30s at night). So chai tea, with a splash of milk and some honey is the perfect drink!

My taste is music is varied. Recently I have been purchasing music for my runs. There are three songs right now that I am currently digging:

Taio Cruz- Dynamite



Enrique Inglesias f/ Pitbull- I Like It



I can’t believe that I actually purchased an Enrique Inglesias, but this song is just so CATCHY. And Pitbull? He just can’t stop making songs that I want to run to. The man is genius. OH NO I just found out that this song is on the Jersey Shore soundtrack. (hangs head in shame) And why is Enrique styling his hair like Justin Bieber in the video??

Flo Rida f/ David Guetta- Club Can’t Handle Me



Oh god. And this song is from Step Up 3D? (hangs head even lower)

I swear that I am not a teenybopper, but any song that makes this white girl want to get down on the dance floor (when I am NOT one for the clubs)? Is good for running.

The other song that I can’t get enough of?

Edward Sharpe & The Magnetic Zeros- Home



It is such an odd song for the NFL to pick for a commercial seeing as the band members are the biggest hippies I have seen in a while, but still. LOVE this song. If you watch the video, it is from Letterman so you can see their tree-hugging, no showering ways. :-)

What are you loving these days?

Cheating husbands

For those of you that have been reading long enough, one of my first posts was about how much I love Brett Favre. How manly he is. How sexy he is. Etc. But lately? His butt is getting a little saggier. He is a GRANDFATHER when I am not even a mother yet. And now….sending pictures of his penis to a Jets sideline reporter (I saw the pictures and little Brett? Ehhh). Sidenote: I was talking to J and she and I both agree that we don’t understand why guys think that sending a penis picture to a woman is sexy. I’ve never seen a picture and have instantly been turned on.

After I saw the video I immediately texted my sister “BRETT FAVRE’S PENIS!!” And she’s all like “I KNOW!!!” (We are very mature, I assure you).

What was he thinking??? And the phone messages? Just scream desperation. So Brett? You are no longer sexy to me. You put your wife through this scandal. She stood by you through rehab. Did you try to cheat on her while she was fighting breast cancer too? Time to retire Brett. And take your penis pictures with you.

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Speaking of cheating husbands, last week I had a dream that I was at a cocktail party with CP and we started to talk to some random woman. She was prettier than me and after a few minutes I was pushed out of the conversation. Meanwhile, CP is trying to bed the woman RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME! When I woke up I was instantly mad at him….which is always hilarious because he has no idea what I am talking about until I realize that it was just a dream and there is no real reason to be mad at him. His sarcastic comment to the dream, “Wait. So you are saying that I am not allowed to do that?” Jerk.

Then two nights ago I had a dream that one of our friends won a trip to Europe. It was kind of a last minute thing, but they invited us and we took them up on the offer since the trip was free. I was trying to check in to the flight at the grocery store (huh? Yeah I didn’t get that either) and ended up missing the flight. CP ended up getting on the flight with our friends without me. I told CP about the dream….he now thinks that I am crazy. And then he commented that I have been having a lot of dreams about him leaving me lately. What is up with that? I don't actually think that he wants to leave me, but something is going on in my subconscious. Hmmm.

I don’t really have a good ending for this post. So….THE END.

Charting

So last week I decided that I was going to start charting. I bought a digital thermometer and signed up for Fertility Friend (the free section).

Since I didn’t start right after getting my period, this month will probably be used to get into the habit of sticking the thermometer in my mouth before getting up to go to the bathroom (unless I am lucky in a little over a week and can stop charting for the next 9+ months!). My chart is all over the place so far and there are a couple of reasons why. First, I don’t wake up at 6:30am on the weekends. Thus I am not taking my temperature at the same time every morning. Second, I always have to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night. Last night it was around 3am, previous nights have been earlier or later. This could vary my temperature results, but there is really nothing I can do about it. Third, I have been taking Nyquil for my cold and I have no idea if that affects temperatures at all.

So far CP hadn’t noticed the three high beeps of the thermometer in the morning, but that has been because he has been up and out of the room before me…..until this morning. My alarm clock went off and I reached for the thermometer. I lay in bed until the beeps went off. They must have woken up CP because he immediately asked “what were those high-pitched noises?”

Tonight I’m going to talk to him about charting (something we haven’t talked about before). He doesn’t want our quest to conceive to become more like work….instead of “practicing” because we are in the mood, we jump into bed because it is a good time of the month. Which I understand. But if I am not pregnant by January, I am scheduled for my annual lady visit. It would probably be helpful if I had a few months of charts to show her and maybe she would have some suggestions or thoughts on why we were not getting pregnant. With only a 25% chance of conceiving even if we do “practice” on the right days, getting pregnant is an accidental thing anyway!

Back from hiatus

Wow. I took a two-week unexpected hiatus from blogging for no apparent reason. Whoops! Hopefully I will get back on board with regular posts starting today….if not, then I obviously don’t have anything interesting to say!

So what has been going on here so far this month….

• CP and I had a nice anniversary. Unfortunately our dinner out to a Spanish restaurant wasn’t that exciting, but the meal that we shared (a whole lot of grilled seafood- clams, shrimp, mussels, scallops, etc.) reminded us of the food we had on our honeymoon (at least while we were in Mozambique). We picked a great day to hike up the tallest “mountain” in CT. Some of our pictures from the day….

If she could talk, Fuzzy Britches would have been saying "HURRY UP GUYS!"

Making FB take silly pictures

The view at the top. What a beautiful day!


• Fuzzy Britches was amazing. For almost being 7 years old, she is not fearful of much. On the way down the mountain we decided to do the loop (the longer way) instead of heading back down the way we came. While CP and I had branches and other items to help us from falling down big boulders, FB had no problems with the terrain. At times she would put her front paws down and slide down the big rocks, using her tail and shifting her weight to balance. It was fun to watch. She definitely slept well that night!
  
• The next weekend CP and I headed up to VT with FB to meet some friends. We drove up to northern VT and met CP’s childhood friends, their wives and kids. I went ATVing for the first time (and surprisingly enjoyed it!) and we took a gondola ride up to the top of Jay’s Peak to check out the views. We saw Montreal, Lake Champlain (in NY) and the White Mountains of NH. Pretty amazing. It was FREEZING though and as we boarded the gondola to head back down to the base, it started snowing!

View from the top of Jay's Peak

• On Sunday morning our friends got a phone call that I don’t wish upon my worst enemy. We helped their wives pack up and wrangle the kids as they raced down to their parents for a family emergency. Sadly there was no happy ending to this story.
  
• Last week I started to run again. Plantar faciistis be damned! I ran a 5K both Monday and Wednesday, only walking up a couple steep hills. My pace was a SLOW 11:30 or so, but I’m simply happy that I am running basically the entire time. It will get better the more I run. Monday night I was in some serious pain while trying to walk because of my heel. I was still limping on Tuesday when I headed into work. Wednesday night and Thursday morning was not as bad, so I’m hoping with lots of stretching and ice I can keep the inflammation down.
  
• CP got sick earlier last week and finally gave it to me on Thursday night. Bastard. I had high hopes of running on Saturday morning before family arrived, but felt icky. I still have a sore throat and some post-nasal drip, but am not down for the count. I probably won’t run tonight, but plan on running Wednesday after work.

What has been going on in your neck of the woods?

One year

On Sunday, CP and I will have been married one year. It seems like our first year flew by!

People often ask if I feel any different now that we are married. I answer honestly- that it really doesn’t feel different from when we lived together before marriage! I do have two lovely rings that I still look at in amazement. I love checking out CP’s left hand and seeing his ring on his finger.

We bought our first house together. While a bigger mortgage than what we were paying in rent in MA means less “free” money every month, my shorter commute has done wonders for my moods when I get home. The availability of more restaurants and the variety reminds us of the bigger cities we have lived in before. And the possibility of meeting people our age through a “new to town” club makes me happy.

We recently made the decision to get a Fuzzy Britches clone puppy. We found a breeder in CT that just had puppies last week. She already sent pictures (Kate- don’t worry I am not posting them yet) and every puppy is adorable. We hope to be able to take FB to meet the puppies in about three weeks. That means we could have a puppy at home with us around Thanksgiving. Yay!

We made the decision to try to get pregnant. While that hasn’t worked out so far (as and of this morning, we will have to try again next month *sigh*), we are trying to have a good attitude about it. No crying. No yelling. No tense conversations. While I hope that our family dynamic changes in a big way during the next year of our marriage, I know that we will survive if it doesn’t.

CP, I know that you don’t read this, nor do you know about this blog (thank goodness), but I love you from the bottom of my heart. Here’s to our future and the adventures that await us!