When to try for #2

Most people say that you need to get out of the thick of sleep deprivation and crying/colic-y babies to even think about trying for baby #2.  In our case though, we had a baby that took three years to conceive (after a surgery, various drugs, two REs, a retrieval and a transfer). Once Izzy arrived, even though we were tired, it didn't matter.  She was so amazing that immediately our minds jumped to when to try for a second (and final) child. It seems fast, but there are a number of reasons that we want to get back on the baby train. It didn't hurt that Izzy was such a good newborn....although we fully recognize that if we are lucky enough to have #2, he or she is probably going to be the complete opposite of Izzy! (Note: despite the fact that we have talked about #2, please know that we have fully been and continue to be "in the moment" at every stage with Izzy.)

The conversation with my OB at my six weeks postpartum visit about birth control was a joke. I know that there are tons of stories about people that are suddenly fertile after doing IVF. I hold no nope that the fertile unicorn dust will enter into my life. We have male and female factor infertility in our relationship. I still have a fibroid hanging out in my uterus (has it gotten bigger/smaller since the c-section?  Who knows) and although I should not have any endometriosis at the moment, it could return with regular menstrual cycles and if I am part of the 50% of women that get endo removed simply to see it come back again. I also am working with a short luteal phase (although maybe not any longer?  Details in my next post) and wonky hormones that are out of normal ranges.

Adding up all of those factors, we hold out no hope for natural conception and CP and I made the decision to not take any birth control. I could give my body some time off from drugs and then I also don't have to worry about birth control messing with breastfeeding. (This may change- details tomorrow.)

So what is the plan? My OB recommended waiting 18 months between births for the uterus to completely heal. Basically, once Izzy turns 9 months old (end of August) we could start trying again. After some discussion, we have decided that we would like to do a frozen transfer of the one frozen embryo we have in January. That gives my body a few extra months to heal and gets us past the craziness of Thanksgiving/Izzy's first birthday/Christmas/etc. Depending on how long I breastfeed, it also gives me at least a month or two to have my body back before (hopefully) needing to restrict myself with food/alcohol due to pregnancy.

Obviously we hope that we are as lucky as the first time and that the embryo sticks and I have an uneventful pregnancy resulting in our second and final child. But just because we were lucky the first time doesn't mean that it will happen again. So the other part of the rush to get pregnant again, if possible of course, is because if I have to do another fresh cycle then we will no longer be working with my 34-year old egg embyro, but my 36 year old eggs. With my somewhat wonky hormone levels my body is not expected to yield very many eggs (like last time) which could lead to more cycles down the road if things don't go well. CP is turning 38 next month and like me, wants to get the show on the road so that we can finish our family building as soon as possible.

The second round of IVF will be interesting. I think that I won't be so nervous about the actual process, sticking needles into my belly, etc. There also won't be as much pressure because we do have Izzy. I think the next six months or so will go by quickly....and then we will have to see what happens! For now I am hopeful....but that might just be because I can enjoy Izzy and not think about my infertility for a few more months....