I find it fascinating that yesterday, as I talk about J as my go-to person and how I thought it was “cute” that CP told my sister that we could be her go-to people, I failed to even think in the reverse. If I sat down and thought about other people that I could count on, there are a few others that come to mind. But not my sister. Maybe because our friendship and trust in each other is fairly new? Maybe because she is my younger sister and asking her for help would seem weak as I am the older and wiser sister?
Whatever it is, I shouldn’t expect her to think that she could count on me if I don’t feel the same way.
From fairly early on in our relationship, CP has impressed upon me that having a good relationship with my sister is important. He didn’t have a great relationship with his sister until their parent’s divorce, but that was now over 10 years ago. While they don’t talk every week on the phone, they are close and once we move to CO, they will hopefully get even closer. His rationale is that my parents are not always going to be around and after that, all I have left is my sister (in my immediate family). And he is correct.
My sister and I haven’t been close for a while because of competition and jealousy. Those are immature reasons for us not to be friends. And if I’m being honest with myself, then it was probably more my fault than my sister’s fault.
So, it’s a good thing that we are working on our relationship. Hopefully I can get to the point soon where I can consider her one of my go-to people too.
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